Trigger Warning – Fertility, Pregnancy loss
I wanted to talk a little about me and why I chose to get into hypnotherapy. This is a difficult, very open and honest post, so please bear with me.
Right now, I have two wonderful children: a four-year-old girl and a one-year-old boy. From the outside, this might look like a picturesque family. However, the journey to get here was far from easy.
I have a number of medical issues that meant I struggled to get pregnant. After a long time trying, followed by a high-risk pregnancy, we finally welcomed our daughter into the world. When we decided to try for another child, I knew I wanted two children fairly close in age. But after trying for some time, once again I was having no luck.
I had been fooled into thinking it would happen quickly, having heard that you’re most fertile after having a child. Instead, every month as ovulation passed and my period date approached, my stress and anxiety increased. I tested obsessively. I became convinced that my anxiety was so high I was making my body a hostile environment rather than a nurturing one in which to grow a baby.
This was when I sought out hypnotherapy. I had used it in the past to help with a spider phobia, and my dad had used it to stop smoking and to help with phantom limb pain, so I already knew how effective it could be.
I worked with a hypnotherapist who helped me tackle my anxieties, and I couldn’t believe how quickly it worked. Very soon afterwards, I fell pregnant. I had a few scares during the pregnancy, but once I reached 12 weeks and everything was going well, we shared the news with our family and friends.
Sadly, at 16 weeks I suffered something called PPROM, where my waters had broken. I was also told that both baby and I had an infection, and that there was no chance of survival. It was recommended that I terminate the pregnancy. The most difficult thing I have ever had to endure.
In that moment, I lost so much. I lost my baby, who we later found out was a girl and named Elouise. I lost the future I had imagined of my children growing up together, my identity as a pregnant person, and the dream of having a close age gap. All taken from me so suddenly. I was also consumed by guilt, believing I had somehow caused this to happen, and questioning whether I had made the right decision.
Once again, I turned to hypnotherapy to help me through this incredibly painful time, knowing how effective it had been before. My hypnotherapist helped remove the trauma surrounding Ellie’s birth, ease the guilt I carried around her loss, and reduce the anxiety I felt around my cycles, negative pregnancy tests, and the fixation on having a close age gap between my children.
During this process, I had a lightbulb moment. I realised this was what I wanted to do.
At the time, I worked as a lettings officer in social housing, a job I loved. Helping people move into a new home and begin a new chapter was incredibly rewarding. But I knew I wanted to do more, to have a deeper impact on people’s lives, and in that moment, I knew hypnotherapy was the path for me. I told myself that once my family was complete, I would retrain.
In September 2024, we welcomed our beautiful boy into the world. I truly believe the tools I gained through hypnotherapy helped me conceive quickly and remain as calm as possible throughout the pregnancy. After experiencing post-partum anxiety with my daughter, I was able to recognise and manage my anxiety much more effectively this time around.
In March 2025, I began my hypnotherapy training. Now, I am fully qualified and ready to pass on my knowledge. Ready to help others overcome their struggles and reach their goals. I am so excited for what the future holds.
I just want you to know that if this story resonates with you, that you are not alone.
If you’re struggling and wondering whether support like hypnotherapy could help, you’re very welcome to reach out for a chat – no pressure, just a safe space to ask questions and see what feels right for you.